Viva Forever
by FireCat1
Summary: Stahn suffers from a death as Rutee struggles ta keep him safe from himself


Disclaimer* I don't own Tales of destiny, Namco does.  
  
I was reading angst fics and listening to some pretty sad music, so I decided, write something with a bit of meaning to life and make someone think for once. Let's see if I can do it.  
  
Viva Forever  
  
Stahn stared hard at the sun, ignoring the brightness tugging on his eyes. His hair got in his face when the wind blew, throwing leaves in his viewing path. The ground had become cold and wet since the early morning ceremony. He didn't wish to get up. It hurt too much to get up.  
  
The stones around him were staring at him, telling him to leave, that it wasn't a place for him, but he ignored them, staying put. The statues seemed to glare at him, hating him for no apparent reason. But, it didn't matter, nothing mattered now.  
  
The sun was setting, it was dark. But it still did not matter. There was too much to leave behind. He couldn't bare it, it was too painful to cry over, but to sad to keep inside, it was almost murdering him. He wished he had been there, with them, dying there with them, feeling everything they had, suffering like they had, like he deserved too.  
  
Then he wished he could forget. Forget what had happened, just move on. But he couldn't, not as long as he lived, this would haunt him forever. The ghosts of the past never disappear. Everyone knows that, but when it's somebody else's ghost it doesn't matter.  
  
Rutee sat on the cold bench, staring at him, sprawled out on the ground, trying to be dead too. It was killing her to see him like this, in this kind of unfixable pain. He was like a zombie through the ceremony and didn't even blink during the burial. He had thrown a fit the day before, that didn't worry her, what worried her was when he lifted up the casket lid to look inside at his past, what he was so haunted by.  
  
He sat up and stared at the stone. It was cold, unfeeling, nothing like the real thing. The town was warm and loving, not made of stone and colors of gray. He wanted to break the stone into a million pieces, send it into oblivion, just destroy it. Like everything else had been destroyed.  
  
He put his cold hands on the even colder stone. The warmth of his hand was sucked from him and into the stone. He almost thought that if he sat there long enough, holding his hand in place, everything would be brought back and be the way it was. But it wouldn't be.  
  
Rutee watched him intently. He was being like she had been when her family had died. No. He was being worse, much worse. This was almost insane. But understandable. All she could do was sit and watch until he was ready for her support. It might take years for this to heal over, but she would be there when he was ready.  
  
He lay back down. He didn't care what time it was. They had always protected him, now he would protect them, no matter how long he had to be there, even if it took for the rest of his life. He thought hard, clouds, like in Fitzgald. But these clouds were different, they were just there, they weren't the beauties of a country, they were just there.  
  
He cursed himself. How could he leave? Nothing was more important than the people in that town were. His parents had been born there, had lived there, died there. He was the first to ever try and leave. Now it was all he wanted to go back to, but it was to late, now he could never go back, never again.  
  
'The love of someone you care about lasts forever, even through death. Can't you see that?'  
  
Rutee thought hard about her lover. Had she ever acted so irrational? Was he just driven insane from the guilt of not being there? What ever it was, it was not going to ruin their life. She would recreate his life, even if she had to pull him through it all.  
  
Stahn heard footsteps and knew someone was approaching him. He watched Rutee kneel down beside him and felt her warm hand on his forehead, then brush his bangs out of his eyes. He closed his eyes and savored the warmth. He would never feel warmth like this again, he was sure.  
  
"Come on, honey. Its time to go. Let's go home."  
  
Stahn felt her tug his arm hard, trying to get him to stand up.  
  
"No." He said flatly. "I'm staying. It's my job to protect them now. I didn't protect them before, so I have to now."  
  
"They're dead, Stahn! There's nothing to protect any more!"  
  
The words stung. It hit down deep in his heart. That wasn't the truth. It can't be the truth, and if it was, he would deny it until it hurt.  
  
"Let's go, honey. You can't change the past. We can't change the fact that people die. What we can do is shape the future. You're not going to shape anything by laying here, trying to be dead!"  
  
"No! Just go away! You don't understand! You couldn't possibly understand!"  
  
"I can't understand what it feels like to lose everything!? I lost my whole family, my closest friend, Atwight, everything, and you say I can't understand?! I left my whole life behind because you said you would take care of me forever, now I guess I'll be taking care of you forever!"  
  
Stahn thought. He had said that. Rutee had cried for so long it had began to hurt him too. Then he had held her in a warm embrace and told her how much he loved her and how he would always take care of her. He had been strong for her, now she was being strong for him.  
  
"I love you." He mumbled, trying to hide the tears of pain.  
  
"I love you." Rutee whispered, holding Stahn tightly in her arms, saying to herself how she would never let him go.  
  
"I'm so sorry. Please forgive me!" Stahn choked out, crying harder than he had last night.  
  
"Shh. What's done is done. I can't replace your family, your friends, your home, but I can guarantee you that if you try you can have that back. But only if you try. That means moving on."  
  
Rutee stroked Stahn's hair as he cried at the truth, finally accepting it. He stood up, brushing the last of his tears aside. He took Rutee's hand tightly and walked with her, away from the massive plot of ended dreams.  
  
Two young children walked away from the monument for the ones who had died in the testing accident of nuclear weapons. The monument was in a strange place, the victims from Fitzgald, and the memorial in Seingald. But it was safe there. The only true Fitzgaldian left would be kept safe in Seingald, along with the memories of all the others from the destroyed continent.  
  
In the heavens the stars shined brightly. The two were children in so many eyes, but adults in the world that they lived in. Until they joined them, the stars would shine brightly for them, hoping only for the best. When it becomes their time, then they will finally be reunited with each other, but until then, the stars will shine brightly.  
  
~End  
  
Wow, that was a real trip. That really got me thinking, even to the point of almost tears! If you didn't get it, Stahn's family and friends died, Fitzgald was blown up by Seingald. It was an accident, but it happened. Now Stahn faces the pain Rutee had, and now realizes what life is about, living. Now its Rutee's turn to care for Stahn. 


End file.
